Here we go again! : )

It has been a while since I have written in here.

Just the other day I was thinking about how I hadn't felt the need to write in here.  But that's because even though I've had some semi-anxious feelings here and there, and have taken my "anti-panic" medicine several times, I haven't felt like I do right now for over three months!  That's awesome!   : )  Yay!

But here we go again right now.

I have a variety of "symptoms" -- the beginning of the panicky type of feelings, the runs, being cold/hot...........

It's 3:16 a.m. (do I put another period after the "a.m."?  It'll look funny if I do, so I'll just leave it.........)

I woke up at around 2:50 a.m. needing to go to the bathroom really urgently.  So I hurried in there and had the runs.   : (  Was it because of the spaghetti I made and ate last night for dinner?

Am I feeling bad because I let the fan blow on me while I was on the floor doing my nightly stretches?

Let's focus on the positive......  It's been over THREE months since I've felt this way!  Yay!

After going to the bathroom, I (yes, I need to clip my fingernails -- they're getting slightly in the way as I'm typing here!) -- I laid back down, but then got cold and then hot, and got these feelings, so decided -- nope -- I need to get up and take some medicine for this and stay up if I need to.  Thankfully we went to bed at a little after 10 p.m. -- so that's another positive thing.   : )  I did get about 5 hours of sleep before this happened.

So I got up, took some medicine and then decided to just stay up for a while and blog while I'm feeling this way.  It's helpful.

I'm a bit tired now.  I'm also thirsty.  I'm going to go drink some more water.  I'll be right back.

Oh -- but before I get up -- I'm also thinking about various scriptures and songs and "The Articles of Faith".   : )

I've gone and gotten a drink of water, and now I'm back.

I'm also trying to breathe.  Breathe in...... slowly and deeply..... and then breathe out....... slowly.  Breathe in....... slowly, deeply..... breathe out............

It's 3:27 in the morning...........

When I logged-in here, I noticed that one of my sisters has posted a few new posts on her blog site!  Yay!  That's something I look forward to going back and reading sometime today.   : )  I might not get to it this morning, but I'll go back and read it soon.  (I will write a note to myself....  There -- note written.)   : )  Thanks to my sister for giving me something to look forward to!

This right here -- these feelings -- are not for me to figure out.  They're just there.  And I'm just "allowing" my body to do it's thing that happens periodically.  I prayed for angels to be with me, and I'm feeling help beyond my own abilities right now.

I think the medicine is helping me too.  Yay!

I need some more water............  I'll be right back....

I'm back, and I'm aware that I'm receiving help from above because I am also aware that the feelings are not gone yet, and that I'm not through this yet.

There's nothing for me to "do" about that, except for just to keep typing.   : )

I'll just stay with what I've got going on here, and just "sit tight" and hold on until I'm doing better.

It's 3:38 a.m.

Earlier, when I decided I'd just stay up until it's "over", I was thinking that it's kind of like staying up with a baby or someone who's sick.  I'm staying up with myself.   : )

I can hear my intestines making noises.

I'm thankful for this blog site to be able to "come to" whenever I need to sit and type at times like these.

I'm thankful that I'm doing OK through this right now.  I'm feeling OK at the moment, despite what's going on.

I'm feeling a bit more tired.......  I'm thinking, "Should I go to bed and lie down?"  "Would I stay there?"  "Would I need to get up soon after lying (or laying?? -- which is it?!) down, to go to the bathroom?".

It's 3:45 a.m. -- Maybe I'll stay up until 4 a.m. and if I'm ready to lie down at that time, then I'll lie down......

That's 15 minutes away from now, and I'm tired now.......  My eyes are feeling droopy.  I might not last 15 more minutes to stay up.   : )

That's good.....

I think I'll quit here for now.  Yep.

If I end up getting back up, that's fine.  For now, I'll just go see if I can stay in bed and fall asleep.

Thanks for tuning in.

That's all for now.

Have a good day.   : )